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UNKISSED BRIDE (Mother Goose A-Go-Go)

SPECTACLE THEATER
Brooklyn, NY

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UNKISSED BRIDE (Mother Goose A-Go-Go)

UNKISSED BRIDE (Mother Goose A-Go-Go)
Dir. Jack Harris, 1966
USA, 82 min.

The almighty Jack H. Harris's only turn as director, UNKISSED BRIDE is the age-old story of a young couple named Ted and Margi (Tommy Kirk and Anne Helm) who have been saving it for their honeymoon, only to discover Ted has erectile dysfunction at the suggestion of nursery rhymes. It may seem like that's an easy thing to avoid, but no matter how our randy paramours try, Mother Goose is always there to block the proverbial shot. Instead of turning that into a kink, Ted visits a psychiatrist (the great Danica D'Hondt in one of her last roles) who prescribes a hallucinogenic spray (I'm not kidding) and we're off to the races.

It's important to note Tommy Kirk (here tellingly billed as Tom Kirk) was trying to break free from his history as a child star (SWISS FAMILY ROBINSON, OLD YELLER, the Mickey Mouse Club Hardy Boys series), mostly via a bunch of beach movies (MST3K fans know him from CATALINA CAPER and VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS). As a star who was fairly unceremoniously released from Disney (presumably but not officially due to Kirk's homosexuality), he might seem an odd choice for a film about a man having difficulties having sex with a woman.

This is compounded when Ted squares off against ultra-lothario Jacques Bergerac (LES GIRLS, GIGI, but *especially* THE HYPNOTIC EYE!) who, as a guy married to both Dorothy Malone and Ginger Rogers, has little trouble flinging some woo. Madcap hijinx ensue (some of which are pretty much guaranteed to offend), and it'd be a mistake to give away the plot, but you just know this is a film with featured songs (including Kirk singing one himself), lots of great LA locations (our couple go to the Troubador at one point), speeding-up-the-film Benny Hill style, Henny Youngman AND Joe Pyne: to put it simply, it's a gas.